(I am high on sick. I was so messed up from this virus that, during tonight's board meeting, I abstained from some votes on the grounds that I was not processing information rationally. I reminded myself at several interwals that pawing at the air like a drunken mime can be a faux pas. At least fever dreams rock.)

But anyway, more notes on my "women's studies participant ethnographic research project."
Too bad it's not for marks. But it is certainly educational.


Between Us Humans...

Guys that I run into but whom I don't know are definitely more polite.
As someone with inerests in travelling, anthropology, social history, and radical gender theory, this is like being an astronomer in space; an oceanologist on a ship; an Egyptologist in ancient Egypt.

But anyway,

The hurt/envy is going away.

I see a well-groomed dykey-genderqueer, or watch a drag king, or scan past blurry self-digitals of birl-y androgyny, or a snap of my ex with a brushed-on goatee, and there is still that slice of ostracism-from-something-important-but-by-the-incontravertable-flesh, and resentment. It's been there for years, and it only became more intense.

So it's still there, and that hurt/envy comes cutting across, but now I'm remembring, oh, I can do that now.

Incredulity follows. Then relief. Tears.

This is good.


My mum was in town, and we took the opportunity to go over all sorts of things: her new house; my studies; family; hobbies; gender. On the latter item, I gave her the okay to tell anyone as she sees fit. Did I mention that my Mum lives in Kelowna? Kelowna: between the ridings of the Honorable Stockwell Day and Darrell Stinson, and per-capita church capital of Canada? It has to happen sooner or later.

Things are getting pretty cool now, and although I remain confused as to how y'all who rely on reading social subtlely get through the day without going paranoid (referring especially to many of you female people), after some consideration, I have decided that I'm pretty sure that the following is not just wishful thinking. There is, of course, no way to know for sure.

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August 2017

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