Only the best memes

[the_fantastic_ms_fox]

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me. It can be anything you want -- good or bad -- BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE. When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.

(I like weird shit)

Comments

[algae-al-fresco.livejournal.com]

We were down by the river and you kept picking up rocks and flinging them into the water. I was a little concerned that you might hit a fish, and eventually dove in to protect a small lizard who was certainly going to have his head squashed by your rock. It hit me on the back of my hand and I remember being shocked as the lizard lept up and bit off my right foot.

[hundun.livejournal.com]

That was your last foot as I recall. I hope the prosthetics is working out well - using cloven hoofs instead of the more conventional shoe-like models was a stroke of genius.

[osmie]

I remember most clearly an incident from your Mycroft Holmes phase. I always thought the pipe was a bit much, but I admired the way you consciously pared down your world to a neighbourhood, your neighbourhood to so few city blocks, and then invested all your attention in noticing everything about that space.

Cycling home, I turned the corner by the park and met you walking, calm and apparently serene, under that tweed deerstalker cap you and rilwyn had found at Value Village. I slowed, but before either of us had called out a greeting, you nodded and said, "I'm glad you're here. I've been thinking a little about the way the patterns shift in the gravel here on the east side of the street, from day to day, and I was wondering if you had any thoughts about the idea of a community palimpsest? I'm thinking of the ways in which people, or animals, who may not come into direct contact with one another, might still collaborate on the fine structure of a shared physical object or world?"

I babbled for about a minute, getting my philosophical bearings, until -- as if to demonstrate your point exactly -- the raven grabbed that pair of shoes from the wires overhead and dropped them right at our feet. It shut me up completely. "I see something remarkable in every step these days," you said.

[hundun.livejournal.com]

Actually the pipe was important; how else to slowly sucking powdered kava root? Chewing is no good: a strong dose just makes your tongue go numb.

remember when

[rilwyn.livejournal.com]

we went skinny dipping in burrard inlet, at crab park at 5 in the morning about 7 months ago? the day was cool, but we raced for the water as fast as we could and made lots of shrieks as we hit the cold water. We followed it up with breakfast at a nearby diner, with plenty of hot tea. I was kicking myself for not bringing my zombie fluxx that time to play in the diner as we warmed up.

Re: remember when

[hundun.livejournal.com]

I can't figure out how we came back with three extra pairs of socks.

[vuge.livejournal.com]

The night that, with the help of Dr Bratlinger, we rotated ourselves ninety degrees on the Fifth Plane and stepped into the collective unconscious. It was cold -- about -20C -- and the moon was up. The secondary highway was empty. We heard a soft moan. We climbed down the bank to investigate and there was Donald Rumsfeld, sprawled in his own sick. When you bent down to close his eyes he started, and began mewling. Taking off your shirt and tie and unfastening your bra, you cradled his head and let him suckle you. I wondered how you could produce so much milk. As he drank you grew younger. William Blake wandered by, clearly underdressed, blowing on his hands and muttering something about cups of gold. Minutes passed. It began to snow. Rumsfeld, much restored, stood up, favouring his knees. He threw you gently over a shoulder, and, patting me on the cheek, climbed up the embankment and boarded the Angela Merkel campaign bus that had just pulled to a stop. The last I saw of you was indistinct, through one of those advertising wraps they put on the window. You were playing Go with KD Lang. You were winning.

[hundun.livejournal.com]

And I did win, and the wager was something to terrible to mention.

[pipkin.livejournal.com]

I remember, barely, the night you took me into that rundown church on the east side. I was hopped up on a mixture of valium and cheap cherry Brandy, and I can't quite remember what you'd taken that night. But when the Minister asked; I said 'I Do.' and then he asked you..

The rest of the night was a blur. I kept popping in and out of conscious-remembering states.. blurred images of choking down cold McDonalds, followed by passing out on a dirty hotel bed mid-coitus.

It was a good time. I just wish I could remember what had really happened.

[hundun.livejournal.com]

We've been over this: you made me swear never to tell you.

[breklor.livejournal.com]

Remember when you won the contest where you got to write a week's worth of scripts for Garfield? And we were visiting that brothel in New Mexico at the time and we'd gone out to the fence by the Trinity test site with a bunch of the women, and they were dressed as Wild West saloon girls and you were dressed as Marty McFly from Back to the Future and I was dressed as Doc Brown, and we'd all done a bunch of peyote, and the women were all swearing they could still see the afterlight from the Trinity test, and you penned this brilliant week-long series of haiku about the intersection between the military-industrial-sexual complex and lasagna? But they wouldn't run it because the last one went:

Nuclear noodles
Flutter like a corpse's wang
Garfield is a dick.

That was so cool.

[givemesodapop.livejournal.com]

Remember that time we scaled everest without oxygen masks.

[hundun.livejournal.com]

Of course! And you decided you liked it better up there and built an igloo.

[plaidalicious.livejournal.com]

We spent all afternoon lounging on the grass playing with each other's hair and making up songs from childhood memories. Or more accurately, song titles, but some of them had lyrics.

"You made me skin my knee, when we jumped out of trees" was the best I think. "The cat dug up the hampster's grave" was a little too upbeat for the subject matter for most people, but I danced to it.

[brunisols.livejournal.com]

How about the time I betrayed beth to build the fish house with you instead. With our combined brilliance, taking over the world was not difficult, however figuring out a material that could sustain the pressure of all that water was a little harder. However, if we are anything, we are stubborn, and we eventually developed a complex system of perpetual repair, employing most of the world's population in sustaining our magnificent fish, and keeping their water in the tanks!

It was a beautiful millennium we spent, but one day we had an argument; I preferred catfish and you preferred guppies, and I threatened to throw you in the shark tank. We realized that power had corrupted even our noble souls, and decided to restore the world back to the way it was. Noone seemed to have noticed what we did, for the most part.